Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Note to my coworkers - again

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Once again, you losers need to be reminded just how stupid you are. I've said it before, but you've pissed me the fuck off one too many times this week. It's only Tuesday people! And so, as a remdiner:

Do not come in my office, and stare at me when you know damn well I’m on a personal phone call.

Do not take my pens! MY pens! I bought them. I have them in MY pen holder (which I also purchased with MY money) because I like to use MY own things.

Do not take my photo paper. While it’s not technically MY paper, it is expensive and I use it for a real purpose, like printing out pictures of my kids.

Do not stop by and chat with me if:
you smell
your hair is dirty
you’re wearing the same thing you wore yesterday and the day before
you have sucky posture and you allow your stomach muscles to relax

Do not ask me where “such and such” is. They may sit in the office next to me, but I don’t ask them where they are going when/if I see them walk past my office.

Turn off the speaker phone. Pick your fucking phone up. You are not that fucking important, and I don’t want to hear every single one of your conversations.

dena at 10:59 AM



at 12:30 PM Blogger Dirk the Feeble said...

Whoa! Simmah down now!

I happen to enjoy the "do you know where X is?" question. Of COURSE I do! I happen to be X's personal keeper and I have constant surveilance on their comings and goings.

at 1:58 PM Blogger Guppyman said...

Work would be so much easier if you didn't have to deal with other people, wouldn't it? Of course... so would everything else...

at 2:35 PM Blogger zazzafooky said...

Ewww... You're having a Monday on Tuesday.

So not fair.

at 2:52 PM Blogger MommaK said...

Do you watch "The Office"? If not, you should.

Tell them I said to leave you alone.

at 5:52 PM Blogger Chatty said...

For the love of God...please tell me you are exaggerating and that nobody really is wearing the same items of clothing over and over again.

If it makes you feel better, I work with, "Blow my full nose thirty times and hock a loogie into my hand loudly" guy.

I sh*t you not...I gag at least fifteen times a day.

at 6:03 PM Blogger used*to*be*me* said...

OMG I forgot how horrible it can be in a big office! Oh, I pity you, you poor, poor woman!

at 6:04 PM Blogger used*to*be*me* said...

Speaking of horrible habits, I used to work with a guy who clipped his finger nails in the office. Well, he died and when his replacement was moving in there, we were moving the desk and there were thousands of nail clippings. I almost yakked!

Sick fucker.

at 8:19 PM Anonymous Deana said...

That probably wasn't meant to be funny but it made me laugh. I bet you are something to work with! Fun to the right people I mean....(clean, clothes changing, normal, other smart ass people)

at 8:25 PM Anonymous Anonymous said...

you should get a plaque made up and put it on your desk or on the wall, or on the door to your office!

at 10:44 PM Blogger ginaangel77 said...

i so miss working with you! i remember how protective of your pens you were and how you had that seperate cup with "dena only" pens. it's nice to see that random stupidity still exist!

at 1:58 AM Blogger Eric said...

Thank YOU! Speaker phones are for quadraplegics. If you gots your hands, pick up the receiver.

at 4:38 AM Blogger OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

I know this is not funny to you, at all..but it did make me laugh out loud, Dena...I LOVE the person asking you where so and so went!!! DELIVER ME! One of my favorite things about visiting people's blogs is when someone is really pissed off and let's whomever have it! I find that DEEPLY satisfying!!! I'm sorry your week feels soooo l-o-n-g....! Take good care.

at 6:44 AM Blogger The Mistress of the Dark said...

I almost wish I had those kinds of issues at work. I only have 4 other people in the office besides me. I miss people butting into my business sometimes.

at 8:04 AM Blogger Marisa said...

The good news is it's hump day today...the work week is almost over.

I liked the idea of priting this shit out and hanging it on your office door. That's will STOP the insanity. ;-)

at 8:30 AM Blogger Uisce said...

Don't even get me started about my co-workers... what? You mean I can blog about them now that I'm incognito? Excellent!! :)

at 10:00 AM Blogger some girl said...

Okay, then! :)

Eww, dirty hair. There's nothing worse...it reeks! It's like, can't they smell their OWN hair??

Hope the rest of your week goes by quickly!

at 10:17 PM Blogger soapbox.SUPERSTAR said...

Not the pens....don't these people know?

Oh you didn't know?


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